New Year's Eve 1968: Jukie, Scene 8 "Black Boy at the U"

They were on the highway now, headed out of U-Town toward the City about a half-hour away. Outside it was dark and it looked cold to Jukie. He was glad to be inside his little bug with its engine-heated air warming him... and this luscious white chick eating up just about everything he was saying.

"Say, Jukie, how did you happen to come to the U? You don't seem the type. I mean mosta’ the Afro-American dudes here are jocks. You don't strike me as one. " Donna asked.

"True, true," Jukie replied. "Not that I don't enjoy a little B-ball on the playground now and then, but I ain't what you'd call no Bill Russell."

"Well, then, what brought you to the U?" Donna asked.

"Well, lessee. It was really my home girl, Patsy Richardson who's responsible. That was her outside just now, leaving the party when we were. You know her, don't you?" Jukie was sure everyone on campus knew Patsy; she was the most prominent Afro-American the campus had ever known… including athletes!

"Well, sure. I mean I know who she is. I saw you arrive with her at the party tonight. And, because she's tight with Bill, I've seen her around the Sosh department quite a bit. Besides, everyone knows who she is. But, I don't know her personally. I'd like to, I guess, but she seems kinda’ stuck up to me. Like her shit don't smell — know what I mean?"

Jukie had to laugh. That was as good a description of Patsy as he'd ever heard. "Yeah! That's her awright! Thinks her shit don't smell! You hit the nail on the head. But, you know, she's really O.K.… helped me a lot here at the U."

"I didn't mean to put her down, really. It's just that I don't usually find it hard to make friends with young black people, but I find her kind of unapproachable. Anyway, how did she figure in getting you here?"

"Oh yeah. Well, one day last year I ran into her. She's at the U Law School on full scholarship after having graduated from here Summa Cum Laude, Phi Beta Kappa, and about every other award you could name. And she looked pretty good too--- a Fro instead of that straightened 'do' her Mom used to make her wear-- I don't know, I was just thinking we might get together for old time's sake, so we made a date for dinner. We went to one of our old haunts downtown in the City and the conversation turned to my ‘career’---I thought the whole idea of my having a career was kind of a hoot--- but Patsy was pretty insistent that I should do something 'bout getting ahead and she encouraged me to apply to the U under their special minority enrollment program."

"That was cool of her," Donna exclaimed.

"Yeah, I 'spose, but I was real reluctant. I wasn't sure I could handle the work, even if they did accept me, which I found pretty hard to imagine, given my piss-poor high school record and all. But Patsy pushed me pretty hard that night and a few other times afterwards. She kind of shamed me in fact, accused me of having no guts."

"Whew!" Donna exclaimed. "Seems to me you had to have had a lotta’ guts to go in the army… even if it did turn out that your job in Viet Nam was relatively safe… you didn't know it would be."

"Yeah, well… be that as it may, when she said that, it got to me, so I said OK I'd try it; and Patsy, she helped me fill out the application and arrange to take the tests I needed to take for admission. Turned out I did much better on the tests than I expected, much better than I'd ever done in high school. I guess I learned something about test taking from all the tests I took in the army and I also probably understand a lot more about all sorts of things, having been out there in the world these past four years."

"Yeah, being out in the world teaches you a lot of lessons, doesn't it?" Donna said, somewhat bitterly.

Jukie was tempted to ask her what she meant by that… for herself. But he was on a roll and wanted her to hear his whole story, so he continued. "Then, to my surprise, I got the word I was admitted. But I had to take this intensive summer program in math and English to make sure I'd be ready for college courses. Man, that turned out to be a big fuckin’ challenge. But, anyways, best thing of all was that I was given a full tuition scholarship and a pretty good paying work-study job, one that would provide enough money for books and shit. And, of course, I could live at home and save money that way. Well, my Moms was so proud, she said she'd be able to handle the rent and food at home for the time I was at school."

"But I thought you said you helped with the rent, didn’t you?"

Whoa! Was she questioning his manhood? "Course I help wit’ the rent!" he spat out. "But, it was important to Mom to make the offer. She was so proud. No one in my family has ever been to college at all, let alone the U!”

“Shit Jukie, I didn’t mean nothin’ by it. I was just confused that’s all.”

“O.K. No offense taken. Anyways, I almost didn't make it through the summer program. It was real tough. Couple of times I seriously thought I'd quit, but every time I felt that way, Patsy would appear, like she knew what I was thinking, and she would talk me out of it. Helped me, too. Helped me with study tricks and coached me on how to deal with these honky teachers, so they didn't figure me for just another ignorant, nig-…uh ‘black boy who didn’t know his place’."

There was that word again! Jukie was finding it felt bad in his mouth, too. Had to talk to Utsie about it. Maybe even talk to Patsy about it, although he knew for sure where she stood on the subject.

Jukie went on. "Well, with Patsy's help I made it through the summer and first semester… but just barely. The courses here are real hard for me, just like I figured they'd be. Even with tutoring, I was on the edge of flunking out. The profs, most of them, they're just like my high school teachers. They speak a different language from me and, as far as they're concerned, it's up to me to learn their language---read in it, write in it, speak in it. I mean I can do it, but it takes a whole lot of effort, you know what I mean? Always having to pay attention to how you're saying something makes it harder to think about what you want to say, so sometimes you end up saying stuff that's pretty obvious, maybe even stupid. Then other times, you get carried away with your ideas and you end up saying them in slang, which the profs correct in this totally embarrassing way!"

Jukie paused, clearly recalling some pretty humiliating classroom experiences here at the U. Then he continued: "And the amount of reading? Well, it's unreal! All this unbelievably boring shit---Plato, Emerson, this French guy Sartra---hundreds of pages every week and most of it makes no sense to me. I mean, I recognize the words O.K., but the sentences and paragraphs just don't make no sense lots of times."

"Hey, Jukie, if it's any consolation to you, I can't make any sense out of Sartre either--- all that ‘being and nothingness’ crap. I do like Plato, though. I find him very modern even though he wrote thousands of year's ago. Emerson? You can keep him, as far as I'm concerned. He's too prissy for my taste!"

Jukie smiled. Hearing Donna's thoughts on these philosopher dudes did make him feel better, less stupid. He continued, "There were a couple of exceptions, thank God. Otherwise I couldn't have stuck it out. My Spanish teacher was pretty cool. This real sexy young Hispanic woman , Senorita Jimenez. You know her?"

"I don't think so," Donna hesitated.

Jukie went on without really listening to Donna's response. "Well, anyway, I thought she kinda’ dug me, you know, sexually. But I wasn't gonna’ push my luck by trying anything. Instead I just worked her attraction to me into getting more personal attention and a pretty good grade for the small amount of Spanish I actually learned. And then there’s Bill…"

Links
Bill Russell
Recollection of being Black at a predominantly white college in 1969
Plato
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Jean-Paul Sartre
Sly and the Family Stone 


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